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Bianca P
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PostSubject: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:32 pm

Dante texted me like he said he would, telling me to be at the airport at 6:15 for our flight. I had A drop me off, promising her that I would bring Tammy home and she'd meet her soon. I also assured her I would be strong. I had to be strong. I couldn't break down. A was right, and I had to keep my resolve.

The flight was quiet. He wouldn't even look at me. He did his best not to touch me, and I tried harder to keep my tears from falling. But I had made a promise, not only to A, but to myself. I had to stay strong. We got a car from the rental company and Dante drove and I sat in the passenger seat, one leg crossed over the other as I kept my eyes off of him. I knew it was the only way I could stay strong.

I directed him how to get there and that was pretty much all that was said. He parked the car and I opened my door, knowing he wouldn't come open it for me. He hadn't opened it for me to get in back at the airport. I pulled my purse more over my shoulder, walking ahead of him toward the door. I kept my head held high, because I knew I had to, to keep this up.

Reaching up, I rang the doorbell, pulling my arms back and wrapping them around myself, waiting for Aunt Iris to open the door. It was about 7:45, so Tammy wouldn't be at school yet. The door opened and Iris was wiping her hands on a towel. Her eyes widened, looking between the two of us. "Bianca..." I knew I had caught her off guard, and should have called, but I didn't even think about it until this moment.

Tamara
Meeting Tammy
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:38 pm

"Tempo per la colazione, Tamara," I called up the stairs to Tammy, hearing a knock at the door. I walked the few steps across the foyer from where I stood at the bottom of the stairs over to the door, opening it. I didn't expect Bianca to show up here. I looked over at the man standing next to her, looking back to Bianca. "Bianca..." I started slowly, before smiling brightly and stepping out toward her, wrapping my arm around her. Pulling back after hugging her, I shook my head, my smile remaining on my face. "What are you doing here? Not that I'm not happy to see you. I am! I've missed you!" I looked over at the guy again and back to Bianca. "Who's this?" Bianca looked back at him for a moment before looking back at me. "This is Dante Castellano, Zia Iris... Tamara's father." I turned back to look at him, smiling over at him. I took a step back. I knew what this meant. She wouldn't be here, especially with Tammy's papa if she wasn't here for her, if they weren't here for her. "Come in. I just made breakfast. We can eat together." I usually made extra waffles when I made them, because Tammy liked to have them for dinner sometimes too. There would be plenty.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:39 pm

I had the feeling of knots all morning as we went straight to her Aunt's. I was almost sick when we finally got there because I was so damn nervous. I was going to meet my daughter. My little girl. The child I had helped created. The child I never knew existed until now. That would make anyone sick. When her aunt opened the door.. I felt a slow rage built. She was someone else that took a man's child away and didn't feel sorry about it. She invited us in and it took all I had not to yell in her face. I came inside anyways but stopped at the door.

"You know, I just, found out, that I have a daughter, and as nice as you're being, I appreciate the offer but I'd much rather spend my first moments with my daughter alone. It's enough she probably believes that me and her mother never loved her, I don't want her to believe she has to be afraid of me, or that she has no right to be with me alone." I took a deep breath.

"I'm her father. And I want my time with her, something I was never granted before because of Bianca, to be alone." I looked over at Bianca and back at her aunt. "Could I take her to breakfast? Maybe she and I can get to know each other. I suppose Bianca can come so she doesn't get scared. But I'd really like our time be alone. Just me and her. Because any parents first moments with their children are personal, are they not? It's not my fault Bianca believed I didn't have the right to that. And I think you've people have taken enough of my rights away." Okay so.. I wasn't as nice as I had wanted to be. But oh well.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:42 pm

I'd never seen Dante be so cold in my entire life. Yes, he was hurtful to me last night, but he was here, berating my aunt because of a decision I had made. She hadn't even known who Dante was before now. I never told her who Tammy's father was. It wasn't as though she knew she was keeping her from him. I never told her who Tammy's father was, so she was innocent in this. He didn't need to yell at her for this.

I wanted to tell him that he was out of line, but aside from getting upset with my aunt, who was innocent in all of this, but I knew he had every right to feel what he did. And if I didn't let him get it out, he'd be even more angry at me. I wrapped my arms tightly around myself, looking over at my aunt. She was a gentle woman. She wouldn't yell at him for what he was doing either. She was too nice of a lady.

I looked back at Dante as she started to tell him how she felt about what had happened here. She didn't know anything about Dante, and she let him know. But she wasn't rude about it. She was completely calm, but I could tell that she was a little disheartened. She knew that if I ever showed up like this it would be because I wanted my daughter. She had told me that the day I gave birth to Tammy. She knew this day would come.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:45 pm

I shook my head, looking between Bianca and Dante. I smiled at Dante, even though my heart was aching. When they were done, they'd take Tammy with them, and I'd probably never see her again. I knew this day would come. From the moment Bianca told me she was leaving her with me, I knew that she'd never be able to stay away. I could tell when she gave birth to her that she loved her, even though she was determined to give her to me to take care of her. I knew she'd never be able to stay away. I was surprised she had stayed as long as she had.

"Dante, in all fairness, I didn't know about you, just as you didn't know about your daughter. My niece never told me who Tamara's father was, and honestly, knowing now that she knows you are her father, I'm sure she knew at the time, and that disappoints me." I looked sternly over at Bianca, still speaking to Dante. "It disappoints me even more that she would keep this perfect little girl from you." I looked back over at him.

"I can understand how you're feeling. You have every right to feel it." Looking back over at Bianca, I shook my head and looked back to Dante. "I will go get her. I told her to come down a few minutes ago. So, I will bring her down to you. Stay here and I'll let her know you're here." I looked back at Bianca before leaving the room. "I really hope this was worth it," I said, walking past her and headed upstairs.

"Tammy," I said, opening up her door and walking into the room. She looked back at me from where she was sitting at the computer on NFL.com as usual, managing her fantasy football team. "I said it was time for breakfast, Tammy." She winced, logging of of the site and pushing herself away from her desk, biting her lip, wincing. "Sorry, Zia. I'm coming." I shook my head and sat down on the bed, patting the bed. "Siediti con me."

She stood up, walking over and sitting down on the bed beside me. "Am I in trouble?" she asked, seriously upset that she was going to get in trouble. "I'm sorry I didn't come down." I shook my head, smiling softly down at her. "Some one is downstairs to meet you." She looked up at me expectantly. "Who? Before school?" I laughed shortly, nodding my head. "Yes, before school."

She sat beside me, waiting for me to tell her who was here. "Your parents are downstairs. Both of them." Her eyes widened. She knew Bianca was her mother, or rather International Pop Star Isabella was, but I never knew who her father was, so I couldn't ever tell her. "She brought him?" she asked, standing up, waiting for my answer. "Yes." Her eyes brightened even more and she ran out of her room and down the stairs to see them.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:47 pm

I felt like popping out a I'm sorry before she ran off but I couldn't muster up the words to do so so I kept quiet. I wondered what my daughter looked like.... like me.. more like her mother. Dark hair. Light hair.. blue eyes.. brown... was she tall? Was she short. I was certain whatever she looked like she'd be the most gorgeous thing in the world. I felt unsteady on my feet, my breathing picking up slightly at the thought of seeing my daughter.

I heard feet, gave Bianca a weak smile out of pure habit and snapped my eyes back to the stairs when I realized what I was doing. I seen a little girl, dark brown hair, who reminded me of a perfect mixture of her mother and I stop at the top of the steps and gasp. My heart did a flip and I found myself fighting the tears. I was smiling so big I was sure it would break my face.

"My daddy is Dante Castellano! No way!" She said, her smile as big as mine. She ran down the steps, not giving me a chance to even step toward her before she was flung in my arms and hugging my neck tightly. I hugged her back just a tight, tears rolling down my cheeks as I buried my face in her hair. "I can't believe Dante Castellano is my daddy!" She said, pulling back to hold my face, brushing at my tears.

"Why are you crying, daddy? Aren't you happy to see me?" I took in a sharp breath, wondering how she knew who I was but not really caring. "I'm just really happy. Really really happy. I have never been happier than I am right now. Of course I'm happy, Princess." I had imagined for years what mine and Bianca's daughter would look like and she went above and beyond how perfect I believed she'd be. "You're beautiful." I told her, sniffling some and wiping my face with my hand as I held her up against my chest with my other hand.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:47 pm

I turned my head hearing the small footfalls of feet coming to the stairs. I turned my eyes to see... Zia Iris had sent me a few pictures throughout the years through my email, but I couldn't save any of them. Someone would have found out. I had to delete them as soon as I got them. But she was even more amazing than I could remember. She was beautiful. She looked just like Dante with a little of me thrown in.

She knew who he was... How, I had no idea, but she knew him. I was about to cry. This was the most perfect moment I could ever remember. I knew things weren't good between the two of us right now, even if I could have sworn he smiled at me for a brief moment before Tammy came running down into his arms. They were so perfect together. I bit my lip, doing my best to keep my tears back. I took a step closer to them, taking a shaky breath.

"Hi, Tamara," I spoke softly. She looked over at me like I was interrupting something I shouldn't have. I pushed forward anyway, doing my best to stay strong. "Your daddy and I would like to take you out for breakfast. Would you like that?" She looked back at Dante. "I want to go to breakfast with you, Daddy!" She hugged him tightly, pretty much ignoring the fact that I was even there.

She pulled back, looking at Dante, her face bright. "I always knew you'd come! I knew that you'd come for me! You would have come before, but you didn't know about me, right? Just like my zia didn't know who you were? I can't believe you're my daddy! I can't believe my daddy is Dante Castellano! You're like the greatest wide receiver of all time! I know I should probably like the Bills, because I live here in Buffalo, but the Jets are the most awesome team! And you're my daddy! This is sooooo cool!!!"

Well, that explained it. She was a football fan. I never would have imagined that, but I wasn't surprised. It was her daddy's favorite sport. It wasn't a shock at all that she would love the sport too. I didn't understand it that well, but if I had to choose, it would probably be mine as well. And she was so excited that he was her father. I couldn't have asked for anything better than this for them meeting the first time. It was perfect... now only if Dante could forgive me.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:49 pm

I found myself chuckling. "I never met a fan bigger than you, Princess. That makes me very happy. Why don't you go make sure you get exactly what you want. We're going on a trip." She said okay and run up the steps as I set her down. I looked back at Bianca. "Thank you. For giving birth to her. Thank you for finding her a home, a family that loved her till I could get her. I see this was best for her. If she had been stuck with you.. she wouldn't be this happy." That was cold, even for me, but in my heat of hearts I believed it. She would have shipped the poor girl all over the world, chasing her dreams and forgetting she existed. I knew she would.

She was that focused on being the best at singing. The top, that she wouldn't even see how miserable her own child was. "I'm going to apologize to your aunt. Because she didn't deserve my anger. She did the best she could.. and you are the one to blame. Seems you lied to everyone." I shook my head, folding my arms over my chest. "When we get home I don't want you seeing Tammy. Ever. Not until she's comfortable with it. Not till you earn that privilege."
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 10:49 pm

Dante's words stung like no other. I knew I had no right to be feeling like I was. I had brought this all on myself and I had to face the music. He was angry with me. More than I could have ever imagined. I knew he was going to be, but I never imagined this much. I never imagined he would go so far as to want to keep her from me. I knew that was what I did to him, but I didn't know my daughter either, and despite what he might think, I wanted to. She was my daughter, and I did what I did because I loved her.

Even if his words hurt, he was right about giving Tammy a happy family. I gave her what she needed. I knew I couldn't be the mother she deserved, so I asked my aunt to take care of her. It wasn't ideal, but I knew at least this way she'd be happy. But I didn't do it because I didn't love her. I loved her with all my heart, just like I loved her daddy. I wanted what was best for her, and since I couldn't give her that with Dante, I gave her to my aunt to raise.

"In spite of what you think, Dante, I love my daughter, and even if you are angry with me, I love you too. I will never stop loving you. I want to be able to make this up to you two, and I'm not going to stop trying to prove to either of you that I love you. I know I've made my mistakes, but that doesn't mean I should be able to fix things. I know I hurt you. I know I hurt her, but we're a family, Dante. We should give that to her. Even if I don't deserve it, she deserves a family. And I can be the mother she deserves." I wanted to say I could be the wife he deserves, but we hadn't even talked about marriage since we had gotten back together, and now I wouldn't even dare bring it up. I know I was still scared, but I could do it... for our family.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 11:21 pm

"We?" I asked, looking over at her. "We should give her that? Why should we do anything? You made your choice. This is mine. The first choice I make at the prospect of having a daughter was to know her. You choose not too. You don't get to fix that now. Hell, there is no fixing it. You fucked up everything. There is no fixing that. No matter how much you want too. If, and that is a huge if, if, Tammy wants to know you fine. But if she says stay away I expect you to stay the hell away. It's easy for you, right? Running? Hiding from things? You did it with me and you did it with our daughter. It shouldn't be hard now. It never was before."

I looked up the steps and back at her. "And even if Tammy wants you around I don't. You can't fix what is broken with us. It's gone. Dead. Buried. Remember that. It's fine for you to have a relationship with her IF she wants with you, however, it's not fine with me. It doesn't matter anyways cause you won't be here. You'll be off on the road, singing your heart out as usual."
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 11:35 pm

I wanted to break down crying right there. I didn't know how long I could stay strong, not when his words were so hurtful against me. I loved him, and I wanted to make things better with him. I would, no matter what he said to me, no matter what he did to make me want to hate him. I couldn't hate him. I loved him more than my life.

I loved my daughter too. I wanted her to be happy. I know I should have raised her myself, and told Dante I was pregnant with her, and we'd be a happy family now. We could have been for years, and we wouldn't have been apart for as long as we were. But my choice has been made, and basically he was telling me I had to live with it.

"Dante, I--" Tammy came running down the stairs with Aunt Iris close behind her. I hugged myself tightly, turning to Tammy as she ran over to Dante with her Jets football. "Can you sign this for me, daddy? I have a jersey too. It has your number on it! And the name Castellano on the back! It's my favorite shirt! Zia says I wear it too much, but I love it."

I looked over at Aunt Iris as she handed me a suitcase and another bag. "It's time to make things right, Bianca. Tamara is quite upset with you," she told me quietly and I looked over at my daughter who was beaming with happiness being with her father. "I know, Zia," I whispered back to her. "And I will. Nothing on Earth can stop me from making right what I put wrong."
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Fri Nov 11, 2011 11:42 pm

I smiled, scooping my daughter up in my arms. She was big. But then again she was 9. But she was still small enough I could wrap her up in my arms. "I'll sign anything you want. All the time if you want. I promise." I turned to Tammy's aunt, well, more so Bianca's aunt. I wasn't sure what Tammy considered Iris as but aunt none the less. "Thank you. I'm sorry about what I said. I was angry and I shouldn't have. You're the one who gave my baby girl a perfect life and I promise you she'll never be taken completely from you. Right, Tammy?"

Tammy looked back at Iris. "Of course!" She beamed at Iris and hugged my neck. "Okay, we're going to drive and get breakfast and then probably get a hotel for the night so we don't have to leave again for another plane ride tonight. Can we come and see you before we leave tomorrow, Iris?" I knew I was running in her and snatching a child Iris raised and I felt bad for that.. but then again I didn't because this was my daughter. My Princess and from here on out I wasn't missing another second of her life.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 12:12 am

I nodded my head, looking over at Dante and my perfect pronipote. "Thank you, Dante." I reached out, running my fingers over one of the long braids to the side of her head. "I'll see you tomorrow before you go, tesorina." Tammy nodded. "Alright, Zia! Ci vediamo domani." I smiled at her, taking a step back, smiling over at Dante. "And don't worry about what you've said. Bianca knows the mistakes she's made and now she has to live with them." I looked over at Bianca, giving her a stern nod. She turned her head away as she walked over to the door. "Ready to go eat, Tammy?" Bianca asked. Tammy looked over at her from Dante's arms. "It's Tamara, Isabella." Bianca's eyes widened before quickly turning and walking out the door. Shaking my head, I leaned over giving Tammy a soft kiss on the cheek. "Have fun and be good." She smiled back at me, nodding. "I will, Zia! Ciao!"
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 12:21 am

I gave Iris a smile, grabbed Tammy's bags and carried her and the bags outside. "So where would you like to get breakfast?" She thought about it for a second before smiling. "Denny's?" I nodded. "Denny's it is." I walked over to the car, letting her down, opening the back door and letting her climb in the back seat. I shut the door knowing she was 9 and old enough to put her own seat belt on. I put her stuff in the backseat, came around to the driver's side, got in and pulled my seat belt in.

"Denny's okay for breakfast for you?" I asked Bianca. "Who cares what she wants." I looked back at Tamara, giving her a stern glare. " I know you're angry but you always treat your mother with respect. Even in your anger, got me?" She nodded slightly and looked out the window. I hated snapping at her but I didn't want her thinking it was okay to speak like that even if Bianca deserved it.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 12:53 am

"Denny's is fine," I said, keeping my gaze faced out the windshield. I crossed my arms over my breasts and crossed one leg over the other. This was going to be a long meal. I knew Dante had just told Tammy not to disrespect me, but honestly, if she felt like saying stuff like that to me, I deserved it. Looking over at Dante after he had pulled onto the road, I asked silently, "Don't you think you should let her speak her mind? She's obviously very angry with me. She should be allowed to say so. You're not going to censor what you say to me, so why should we censor what she's saying?"
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 3:29 am

I gripped harder at the steering wheel, mostly because she was telling me how to parent. "Umm, Bianca," I said lowly after flipping the radio on. "Tammy do you like any sort of music?" She turned her eyes to mine in the rear view mirror. "Yep! Pop, please!" I nodded, flipped it to the pop station and turned back to Bianca. "She is a child. A child doesn't have the right to be rude to any adult for any reason. I am an adult. I can speak my mind because I'm not 9. She's 9 and should respect her elders. Even if said elder deserves every ounce of crap thrown at her. So, no I don't think she should speak her mind. I'm sorry you believe it's acceptable for a child to speak the way she just did to you but I don't."
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 4:14 am

I closed my eyes, turning my head away from him again. Moves Like Jagger by Maroon 5 and Christina Aguilera was playing on the radio and Tammy started singing along with Aguilera. "... own me just for the night. But if I share my secret, you're gonna have to keep it. Nobody else can see this. So watch and learn. I won't show you twice. Head to toe, oh baby, rub me right."

My eyes flipped back to Dante and back into the back seat. I suppose it wasn't the worst thing in the world for a child to be singing, or even listening to for that matter, but I still couldn't believe those lyrics were coming out of my daughter's lips. I made sure my music was appropriate for all ages, and adults even enjoyed it. Again, I didn't think it was the worst thing in the world, but I was still shocked that my nine-year-old was singing this song.

She had an amazing voice. Smiling softly, I laid my head back against the seat, listening to her sing. "But if I share my secret, you're gonna have to keep it. Nobody else can see this. Hey! Hey! Heyeah!... Take me by the tongue now... Hey eyeah!... Hey, yeah yeah!... Oh, yeah yeaaah!... Yeah ooooh! Oh, ooooh!" The radio announcer came on the radio after the song ended, saying, "Maroon 5 and Christina Aguilera: Moves Like Jagger. I just can't get enough of that one." The first bars of the next song started playing, and I closed my eyes, turning my head back to look out the window to my side. I didn't need any introduction to this song. "This next song is a new one off Isabella's new album. It's called Last Night and you're hearing it here on KISS 98.5."

I kept my head turned away, swallowing hard. I was sure no one wanted to hear me singing right now. It was the reason why we were where we were. I had my career because I had given up Tammy and my future with Dante for it. "All I want is to be a part of your weekend. All I need is a little bit of your time. Baby, I'm your girl, and I just need some attention. When you ignore me, I just lose my mind." Reaching out, I flipped the radio station. I didn't care what it landed on. All that mattered was not listening to the reason for our situation. I couldn't bear it.


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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 5:33 am

I think my eyes snapped so wide open at Tamara singing the dirty lyrics to that song that I could barely focus on the road. But I found a way to snap myself out of it and gripped harder at the steering wheel. Thankfully the damn song ended.. but it went from one terrible thing to the next. I wanted to yell out fuck my life but refrained. Thankfully Bianca changed it because the idea of being forced to listen to the thing that destroyed my life.. well, it wasn't pleasant. The song that popped up made me crack a smile. An oldie but a goodie.

"Daddy, please change it.. I don't like this.." I laughed. "No way, Princess! Marvin Gaye is a classic! Whennnnn a mannnn lovessss a womannnnn" She laughed, shaking her head. "Mo.." She stopped herself, obviously noticing what she was doing in the heat of laughter. "Isabella make him change it!"

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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 6:06 am

I turned my attention back to Tammy. I hated that she was calling me Isabella, but I suppose that's who I was to her. She was mad at me because I had left her with my aunt. But Dante comes into the picture and she just assumes that he never knew about her and that is why she's super excited to meet him, but I'm nothing but the woman who abandoned her.

"I'm sorry, bambina. Your daddy likes this song and it's better than what was on." She made a pffft sound and shook her head. "Even your song is better than this one!" I looked back at her and she looked up at me with her big, beautiful eyes, pleading with me to get him to change it. "Please," she batted her eyelashes at me, "I'll even sing along!"

Something told me that she meant that as a jab. Meaning she knew my songs, but that didn't mean she liked them. Shaking my head, I felt bad, even if I wanted to give her what she wanted. "Sorry, bambina. Daddy wants to listen to this and no one really wants to listen to any song of mine."

She crossed her arms over her chest, turning her head away from me. "This is no fun! And don't call me bambina. I'm not your baby girl, Isabella!" Her tone was harsh and it hurt, but she had every right to feel that way. She turned her attention back to Dante. "Daddy, pleeeeeaaaaase change it back to Isabella's song! Pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaase???" I turned back to look out the windshield. I wasn't going to say anything else. Dante could do what he wanted, and I'm sure it wouldn't be turning it back to my song.

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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 8:53 pm

"Tamara," I said, read to tell her not to bug but decided not too since we were pulling in the driveway. "It doesn't matter, we're here." I told her, cutting off the engine, undoing my seat belt and getting out. I shut my door, walking to the backdoor, opening it and letting Tammy out. She hopped down, grabbing my hand and smiling as I shut the door. "What's that smile about?" I asked. "Just happy. I always knew you'd come for me. It was never a doubt in my mind, daddy." I smiled, squeezing her hand tight.

"I'm glad you know that. Had I known you existed I would have came sooner." She frowned. "You didn't know because of Isabella?" She asked, snapping a glare back at her as we walked inside. "No, I didn't know for a lot of reasons. Not because of your mommy." Yes I lied but I didn't want her to spend the rest of her life hating her mother. Even if Bianca deserved it. I didn't want my little girl walking around with so much hate inside. And I didn't want Bianca to have her own daughter hate her so I lied.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 9:55 pm

I walked in behind them. I didn't know why Dante was lying to Tammy. Maybe for the same reason that he didn't want her talking back to me. It was really nice of him, even if he was pissed with me. The waitress walked up to us, smiling that fake smile I was familiar with. "Three?" Tammy nodded quickly. "For my daddy and me..." she glared back at me, "and her." The waitress looked back at me and I turned my head down, shaking my head. She didn't have to bring our problems out to the world. But I guess it was subtle. The waitress wouldn't know exactly what our problems were. The waitress nodded, her fake smile remaining as she told us to follow her. "Booth ok?" Tammy climbed up on one side, pulling Dante to sit beside her. "Boot is great!" The waitress laid the menus down and asked if we'd like anything to drink. I waited until both Tammy and Dante ordered and then ordered myself a cranberry juice. The waitress jotted it down and told us she'd be back to get our order. I crossed one leg over the other under the table and opened the menu to look through the breakfast options. I wasn't hungry, but this was our first meal with our daughter, I wasn't going to ruin anything by not eating. I'd already ruined everything else.

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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 11:26 pm

"What would you like to eat with your Orange Juice, Pumpkin?" I asked, opening the menu. She sat on her knees, not that she needed too. She just choose too. She leaned in her head in hands, letting her elbows rest on the table as she glanced over the menu I had opened for her. "Pancakes with some bacon, please!" I nodded, smiling. "Perfect choice! I think I shall have the same with a side of whip cream and strawberries." Her eyes lit up. "Can I have some too, please?" I nodded. "Sure can." I looked over at Bianca, taking a deep breath as I closed my menu and Tammy started to draw doodles on her paper menu.

"What about you, Bianca? Anything you see you want?" I was trying. I shouldn't try. But I was anyways. Our daughter deserved that much from me. Maybe Bianca was right.. maybe our daughter deserved a real home.. a real try at a family.. but how would that work without me and Bianca together? I was going to have to figure it out. And fast. So that we were all a family when we came home, even if Bianca and I weren't together.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sat Nov 12, 2011 11:52 pm

Strawberries. They were always my favorite. And whipped cream. We'd be sharing our food if he wasn't so mad at me. I loved when he would feed me. He'd cut a bite and hold his fork to me over the table. But that wasn't going to happen today. He hated me, I was sure of it. Even if a part of me deep down wanted to believe that he was still in love with me, I knew he hated me for keeping Tammy from him. I put that same fake smile on my face, acting as though nothing was wrong. "That sounds good. Strawberries and whip cream for me too." I closed the menu and slid it forward, unbuttoning my coat and pulling it off my shoulders. I let my fingers slide down over my necklace, holding it in my hands as I looked... anywhere but at across the table.

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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sun Nov 13, 2011 10:20 am

"See, mama has great taste just like us." Tammy smiled at me and then her mom and went back to her doodling. I ordered us all breakfast when the waitress came back and looked at Bianca. "What hotel would you like to stay at? I'm sure you know this area better than me, so, any suggestions?" She wasn't looking at me. But I was at least going to try and make conversation so the entire morning wasn't completely awkward and full of silence.
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PostSubject: Re: Meeting Tammy   Sun Nov 13, 2011 5:33 pm

I looked down at the silver wear wrapped in the napkin in front of me. Anything to avoid looking at Dante. "There are many nice places to stay around here. I guess the two nicest would be the Avant or the Mansion on Delaware. Either would be good." I felt like a travel agent. I didn't mean anything to either of them. Perhaps it would just be best if we spent the day away from each other. "I was thinking," I said, taking the spoon out of the wrap and absentmindedly playing with it. "Maybe after we eat, you two would like to go to the zoo or something. I am sure you would like some time alone with each other." I hated this, but I had brought it on. This was my fault and I had to pay the piper.

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