Please let me in, baby...

I hadn't slept all night. I had to leave the bedroom, because my tossing and turning was keeping Megan up, and she had a day full of meetings, so I didn't want to keep her awake. I had spent the rest of the night in the den, thinking about Robyn. It's why I couldn't sleep in the first place. Once Megan left for work, I showered, took Bianca to school, and headed to Robyn's. She still wasn't answering my calls, and I had to see her. I had to talk to her. She didn't answer the door, and I had no idea which apartment was Eric's, or even which apartment was Ashley and Jaimi's. And I didn't know any of their numbers, so I headed to Seychelles to see if Robyn was there, or any of the to see if they knew where Robyn was. I had to see her.

I walked into the restaurant, and there she was, serving a table. God, she looked beautiful. She looked exhausted, but she was still the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. Ashley walked up to me, smiling. "Hey, boss." I pulled my gaze from Robyn, shaking my head. "Boss?" Ashley smiled, sliding her pencil over her ear. "We had a staff meeting this morning. Ryan said you and Robyn's sister are buying the restaurant. Just thought I'd get used to calling you boss." I nodded my head. "We are." But that was about all I said about that, looking over at Robyn and then back to Ashley. "Hey, do you think you could put me Robyn's section?" Ashley looked over at Robyn and nodded. "Of course, boss. Lemme show you to your seat." I followed her, and she set me up at the bar. "Do you need a menu?" I shook my head. No, I'm good. I'll start with coffee though, please. Double cream. Double sugar." She nodded and headed off to get it.

Pregnant. Who knew one little word could change your entire life? Who knew one tiny insignificant word could take a perfect world and shatter it. I wanted to be happy. God, did I. I really did. This is all i had wanted. A baby... a baby with Wesley. And yet I couldn't even stop crying long enough to smile. I hadn't slept a wink, sitting up all night thinking about what I'd possibly do next.. thinking about a future where I'd raise a child without Wesley. A child that would never know it's father. A child that would be born into a world it never asked to be born into and be hid. It was unfair. Instead of celebrating the only thing me and Wes wanted I was dodging him and his calls, hiding from him.

He'd see something was wrong and I wasn't ready to tell him. Not till I figured out something to do. Of course I'd keep this baby. I'd never kill my child.. and I'd never fathom someone raising him or her.. but that didn't mean I wasn't any less sure of what the future held. I was just getting ready to take some soup to a customer when I caught site of Wes. It stalled my feet and made me stare as if I looked long enough he'd just disappear. Of course he didn't and all my standing there got me was a crabby customer. I sighed, walking over and putting his soup down before walking over to Wes. "Welcome to Seychelles. I'm Robyn and I'll be your waitress today. Are you ready to order or do you need a few minutes?" Okay so I was treating him like a customer but it was the only way I'd get through this without running away crying. I was exhausted. My eyes burned, my stomach felt emptier than normal and my feet were tired. I didn't want to add a tear streaked face to the rest.

I swallowed, looking her over. "Seriously? Is it like that now?" I shook my head. What did I do, Robyn? Why are you shutting me out?" I had leaned over across the counter so she was the only one who heard me. I couldn't believe it had come to this, and I didn't even know why? Because Megan was having my child, and she wasn't. I didn't want this baby anymore than she wanted Megan to be pregnant, well, I couldn't say that, but I didn't want Megan to be carrying my kid. I wanted Robyn to be carrying my child. It was all both of us had ever wanted.

"Please," I begged, my lip trembling. "Don't do this here. Please. I just want to get through my shift so I can go home and sleep some before your pops dinner. Please don't make this harder on me. Just order your food, please." I could feel tears prick at my eyes but I blinked them away. I didn't once look up from the pad of paper in my hand, knowing if I did I would cry and I wouldn't stop.

"Can we go back in the employee lounge or something? I really think we need to talk, baby. I didn't sleep last night. I've been going crazy thinking about this space that's between us and why it's there. Please, Robyn. You can take a break. I'm practically your boss anyway. I can almost tell you to take a break." Ok, so I didn't like that I'd said that, but I really needed to talk to her. I needed her to open up to me. I couldn't stand this distance. It was killing me being away from her.

"Fine." I sighed, stuffing my pad of paper in my apron, as well as my pen. I told Ashley I'd be only a second and walked back to the employee lounge. "Make this quick. I don't wanna leave Ashley and Jaimi by themselves. Lunch rush hour comes soon." I folded my arms over my chest, not looking at him, knowing if I did I'd most certainly crack and cry like a baby.

I shut the door, locking it, not wanting anyone to come in and disturb us. I took her by her shoulders, making her turn toward me. "Robyn, please. Don't shut me out. I know this that's going on with Meg and me is serious, but I swear to you, it is not going to change the way I feel about you. Nothing ever could, Bobby."

"Oh, Wesley, it's so much bigger than that now... so much worse. You have no idea." I had fought with the tears but the second I saw his face I felt them rolling down my cheeks. "Wesley, Megan being pregnant doesn't just change things... me being as well changes things too." I bit my lip, trying to keep from sobbing. I didn't realize what I had said till it was said. I didn't want to hide it.. but this also changed things.. if he got what I meant he'd know the truth and I wasn't sure what was going to happen next. I was scared.

I blinked, my whole world screeching to a halt and freezing there. Did she seriously just say what I think she just said. I replayed it over in my mind. Was it wishful thinking on my part, or did she really just say she was going to have a baby? I was sure she did. Not even thinking another second, I quickly wrapped my arms around her and spun her around. "Robyn," my voice held so much excitement, so much love, "you don't know how amazing this is! This is all we've ever wanted." I knew we knew we could never have it, but maybe we could. Maybe we could have a family together somehow. I didn't know how, but maybe we could. We could figure it out.

I stopped spinning her, quickly setting her back on her feet. "I'm sorry. That's probably making you sick. Is it?" I placed my hand on her stomach. "Are you still feeling sick? Oh! That was morning sickness! But did the spinning around make you sick. I'm so sorry, baby. I'm so sorry." Leaning down in front of her, I kissed her stomach, rubbing it softly. "I'm sorry to you too, baby, if I made your mama sick. I know it can't be easy on you either." I kissed her stomach again, rubbing it as well, before standing up, smiling brightly down at her. "Robyn, this is amazing! This is the best thing that could ever happen to us! We're going to be parents! God, I love you!" I pulled her closer to me, kissing her deeply, never ever wanting to let go.

I pulled back from the kiss, breathing heavily, trying not to sob. I was sick but not because he twirled me around.. because he was so happy. I didn't want to have to face him with reality. Not the reality that had been sitting on my shoulders since the second I was told I was pregnant for sure. "Wesley," I said, breathing in deeply, letting his scent fill my senses. "You don't understand..." I looked up at him. "you can't be there for this baby... you won't be there for appointments. Or when he or she is born.. they won't know you as their father. You'll be their uncle. Don't you see how awful this is?" I let tears go, lifting my hands and covering my face. "This is not how I wanted this to be."

I pulled her head down to rest against my chest as I held her against me. "Listen to me, Robyn. This is the best thing that could happen to us. I don't know what our future holds," I told her, kissing the top of her head softly. "Neither of us can. But there's no way I'm going to let anything come between us. We're going to be ok. We'll figure out things."

"I wish you'd stop saying this can be fixed. It can't. Not unless I had an abortion." I shot my head up fast. "I'd never do that. So this can't be fixed. And I'm not hurting my sister with the truth. I can't do that. You can't ask me to do that. She's having your baby too. She loves you.. and she thinks your faithful... and she thinks I'm a wonderful sister. This can't be worked out, Wesley. It can't! Don't you understand that!" I pulled away, brushing my face dry, my back to him. "None of this can be fixed."

"It can't be fixed because you're refusing to let it be. There is a way we can all be happy. I don't know how, I don't have any clue, but I know we can figure it out. Why are you so hellbent on not letting it happen?" I sat on the couch, sighing heavily. "Fuck," I said, burying my face in my hands. "I wish Megan never would have gotten pregnant."

I snapped my eyes to him, wide. "What?? Don't you dare say that! That's not fair to that baby or my sister! That baby is important. Just as much as my baby. Our baby." I touched my stomach, tears burning at my eyes. "That baby was made out of the love you have for Megan. Don't you say that! That's not fair! Damn you, Wesley!" I unlocked the office door and walked out it.

I stood quickly, running after her, wrapping my arms around her from behind, burying my face in her hair. "Robyn, Bobby, baby, sugar, angel..." I kissed the back of her head, leaning my forehead against the back of her head. "The baby is blameless in all of this. But you know I don't love Meg near as much as I do you. You know all I want is a future with you. You know that. But both of us care too much about her to hurt her like that." I inhaled deeply. "God, I wish I would have met you before Megan." She would have only been twelve at the time, but I still wish I would have. More than anything.

I closed my eyes tightly, trapping the tears. "Wesley, please," I whispered. I registered where we were and turned in his arms quickly. I shoved him back inside the office, shutting the door and clicking the lock. I let my back relax against the office door as I looked up at him. "I wish you had met me before her too.." I buried my face in his chest, crying. "I wish we could be together. You, me and our baby."

I kissed the top of her head, holding it in my hands. There was nothing more I wanted than for things to just be Robyn and me forever. If I could figure out a way for her and me to walk out of this office and be together without hurting anyone, I would. I rested my head on top of hers, inhaling her deep into me. "I wish there was a way we could be together, you, me, and our perfect little baby." I moved my hands from her head, dropping them to her stomach, rubbing it softly. "This is all we've ever wanted. You and me as a family. This baby makes us a family... even if everything is all messed up. We'll figure things out, baby, I promise you."

"I love you, Wesley Frost." I whispered, kissing him softly on the lips. "I love you so much." I really did. More than anything. Despite the wrongs in our relationships I loved him more than anyone. I moved my hands up to his chest, gripping slightly at it, kissing him more deeply, letting my tongue massage his. "Love you." I whispered again, kissing him more.

I pulled her body to me, wrapping my arms around her and kissing her even deeper. I loved this woman, more than life itself, and if there was anything I could do to make things work between us, without hurting anyone, I would. And maybe Robyn and I would change our mind down the line, but as for now, things had to go on like they were. I'd figure out a way to split my time more between her and Megan. I'd figure out a way I could be with Robyn more. Megan and I were buying the restaurant. She would still be busy with N2H and all she had going on there. I'd be the one running Seychelles mostly. It was as perfect of an excuse as any for us to spend time together. It was perfect.

I pulled away smiling up at him. "I love you but I need to get back to work before someone starts asking questions." I smoothed his collar down on his shirt and pulled away. "We can talk after the dinner at your pops, you think you'll get a free second?"

I tucked her hair behind her ear. "Yeah," I softly whispered. "I'm going to head home. I have some things I want to try to get done. Unless you'd like me to stick around?" I really didn't want to leave, but if I was going to be a distraction to her in any way, but if she didn't want me to go, I wouldn't go either.

"No, you're okay. No need to hover. I'll talk to you later." I kissed him softly on the lips again before pulling back and opening the door. I walked down the hall, giving him a back glance smile before going back out to work.

I smiled at her, inhaling deeply. I looked back at the office we had been standing in, thinking I was going to have to change a few things when the sale went through, but that wasn't important right now. I walked out, laid some money on the counter where I'd been sitting, where the cup of coffee sat, winking at Robyn before heading out the door.