back where I belong

I woke up, afraid everything had just been a dream, but as I turned, my naked body pressed up against the other naked body in the bed next to me. It wasn't Jules' body. I was finally back in Dante's arms where I belonged. We had made love and fallen asleep, and now I was waking up to a brand new life with him... Or at least I hoped we would. I didn't want to go back to the arrangement we had before. I wanted to be a family with him. I loved him and wanted things back to normal. Well, we never had normal, but at least we could find a way to get there now.

I shifted, lifting my head off his chest, looking at him in the darkness. The rain had gotten worse, thunder and lightning threatening the very building we were in, the hut Jules and I had shared together. Dante hadn't wanted to stay in the room Jules and I had shared, and I didn't blame him. If he knew what Jules and I had done in there, he'd never forgive me. But I couldn't keep that from him. I had already kept enough from him, and this might be the final nail in our coffin, even if we had just reunited.

"Dante," I whispered, kissing his chin. "I love you so much. I have missed you, even if I couldn't remember, I have missed you. But I remember now, and there's so much I need to apologize to you for. Things that happened before I left. Things that I've done since Julius came and got me from the hospital. Things that I knew I can never be forgiven for, but I beg you. I beg you never to leave me. I will make up for everything I did. I swear to you, I will. I love you and I never want to lose you ever again. I love you so very much and I would never hurt you again. I swear it!" I'd ask him if he would forgive me, no matter what I told him, but I knew I couldn't ask that of him, considering all the horrible things I've done.

I was mostly asleep, listening to the rain and Bianca's breathing. However when I felt her stir and her lips press against the flesh under my jaw I smiled. I hugged her tighter to me. I couldn't even ask anything before she started rambling off about something. I turned my eyes down to her, raising my eyebrow. "What? You have nothing to be sorry for." I meant that. I was the one who had so much to be sorry for. I was just scared to throw it out there.

"Don't be sorry. None of this was your fault. Not a single second." I rubbed her naked back, kissing her forehead. "This was all my fault. I've done things that brought us to this moment... I am the reason for every single thing that's happened since the news about Tammy surfaced." I was. Even down to her being shot in the damn head.

I let my head drop. "No. If I would have never kept Tammy from you. If I wouldn't have run away from you in the beginning, if I would have stayed and been strong, none of this would have happened. We would have been a family long time ago and I never would have gotten involved with Julius in the first place. He never would have come to the hospital to take me away from you, and I would have never slept with him." Closing my eyes, I swallowed hard, lifting my head. "I'm so sorry, Dante. I am so sorry. I know I can't ask you to forgive me, but I swear to you that I will never stop trying to make it up to you. Never in my life will I ever stop trying to make it up to you!"

My eyes snapped open in rage. Not at Bianca. At Julius. He was scum. Vermin! Hell he wasn't even that good. He was the damn shit that came out of the fucking rats! He was an evil bastard and I was going to tear his throat out. "I... dead." That's all I could manage to get out as I shook in anger. "DEAD. DEAD." I meant it. He was dead. He was a motherfucking dead man!!!!! He took advantage of her and I would make him pay. I would! That slimey son of a bitch!

I wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his naked chest. "Dante, I'm sorry. I'm so terribly sorry. I love you, I do! and I will never do anything like that again! Never!"

"Stop being sorry! That bastard took advantage of you! He... he.. he raped you! It's rape! He's dead!!! I mean it! I'll fucking kill him!" I hugged her tighter to me. "Don't be sorry. God, don't be sorry! This isn't your fault!"

I didn't care what happened to Jules, but I did care what happened to Dante. "You can't, Dante. I can't lose you. I need you! You say things aren't my fault, then don't do anything you know will take you from me." I hugged onto him tighter. "Please don't!"

"You can't ask me not to defend you! You can't ask that of me!" I sat up, looking down at her as the lightening crashed and made her brighter in the dark. "You can't seriously ask me to just let something like THIS go!"

I sat up, kneeling in front of him and cupping his face with my hands. "I can't lose you. Do anything you want to him. Hurt him. Just don't do anything that would take you away from me." I wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him to me. "I can't lose you."

I hugged her to me, burying my face in her dark curls, breathing them in. I had missed this smell.. this feel of her. "Fine.." I sighed heavily. "Fine.." I pulled back. "There's something I should apologize for.." I sighed, my eyes turning away from her. "Tessa's pregnant.."

I fell back, my rear landing on my ass. Wrapping my arms around my breasts, I bit my lip, trying to keep the tears back. "Jules and I didn't use protection, Dante..." Not that Dante and I ever had, but if I ended up getting pregnant with Julius' baby and not Dante's... "I'm never forgiving myself."

I closed my eyes tight, sighing heavily. "None of this... Jesus... how did everything get so fucked up?" I asked, ignoring the room shaking. "I can't believe how bad I fucked it all up." I rubbed my head, sighing.

I turned back to him, crawling over onto his lap and wrapping my legs and arms around him. "It takes two to tango, Dante. Neither of us are blameless, but that doesn't mean we can't come back from it. We came back to each other after ten years apart, and you forgave me for everything then. We can make this work."

"You're right... as long as we stay honest. Okay? As long as we are both completely honest." I brought her hand to my lips and stopped when I saw the ring there. "This isn't needed.." I mumbled, plucking it off and tossing it aside.

I giggled, hugging him to me. That finger should have always been reserved for Dante. I'd never had a ring from him, but if we were ever going to get married, I would have a ring on that finger and it would be from him. Like it should be. "I didn't like it anyway. So gaudy!" I giggled some more, kissing him deeply.

I laughed. "I guess he didn't know you as much as he'd like to believe." I kissed her lips and stopped when I felt the room rumble again. "Damn that storm out there is getting brutal.." The clock near the bed flipped off. "I think the power went out.."

I frowned. I really didn't want to pull myself from his arms, but I thought it would be good to go check on the others. "C's afraid of storms, D. We should go make sure everyone else is alright."

"You're right.." I slid off the bed, lifting her up and onto her feet. However when I went to step forward the room shook so hard that I fell right back on my butt on the bed. "Shit.." I turned to Bianca. "Are you okay?"

I nodded my head, looking over at him. I was glad Tammy wasn't here. I didn't know if she was afraid of storms like C or not, but this was starting to even scare me. "I'm alright. We need to get dressed. Are you alright?"

"I'm okay.." I stood, handing her her dress that was next to the bed before looking for my own clothes. I tugged my boxers on and stopped when I felt a gust of air whip through the wind and literally shake the entire house, things crashing off the walls. "Jesus...."

I stood closer to him, grabbing onto his arm, even though I was still only holding the dress, not having put it on yet. "Dante, this is bad. Its getting worse. Tell me we're going to be ok." Even if it wasn't, him telling me it was would make me feel better.

"I know. It's going to be okay. I swear it." I knew I shouldn't promise that, especially since it literally felt like the house was shaking so hard it was being torn apart. "Here, let me help you." I told her, sliding her dress on. I grabbed my own pants, tugging them on and stopping when things got silent. It was eerie. "Down," I told her, pushing her to the floor and laying over her. I felt the house shake so roughly that the roof whipped off and flew away, letting the rain drop on us and the evening light shine through. "No matter what you do," I screamed, "don't let me go!" I didn't even have a chance to worry about the others. I just prayed to God above they'd be okay.

I shook underneath Dante, only now getting scared. I knew Dante was trying to make me feel safe, and he was, but I knew we were in serious danger. I pulled his arm around me, holding it there.
"I'm never letting go!" I felt like Rose and Jack right now and suddenly got even more scared. "Dante, don't you dare ever let me go. Never. Never never!"

I was just about to promise I wouldn't when water engulfed the bedroom and slammed us both forward and then dragged us back. I tried my hardest to keep my hold on her but it was so strong. The grip against me tugged so hard that I had to let go, especially when I smacked into something and pain ripped through my side. I saw her hand, tried to snatch it but lost it in the dark water.