taking care of Little One

I glanced up from my spot on the couch and smiled at Jackson. "How'd you know? I'm starving. And of course I'll like it!" I shoved myself up off the couch, tossing the blanket aside and taking Jackson's hand, kissing it as we walked toward the kitchen. "It smells like.. spaghetti.. am I right?" I saw I was and smiled. "A nose of a bloodhound. At least." I grinned, leaning up and giving him a kiss before going over and taking a seat at the table.

"Please," I said smiling at Jackson. This felt domesticated. Right. Who knew I was meant for a life like THIS. But here I was. I watched him pour it and took a long sip before setting it down. "You know before I got pregnant I hated milk. Like HATED it. But.. yet.. your kid.." I joked, touching my stomach. "Just loves it!" I laughed.

I glared playfully as I picked up my fork. "You mean yes SHE does." I grinned, taking a bite.

I rolled my eyes, laughing. "You are going to eat your words in a few months when a girl pops out.." I nodded. "Yes please." I looked around. "House feels empty without Kyle.." I said, glancing back at Jackson as I bit into my bread.

"Sounds good. But I was thinking more about.." I slid my foot up against his crotch smirking. "But a movie can do just as good." I smiled, taking a bite of my bread again as I pulled my foot back.

"Hmmm.." I stood up, pushing his chair back and sliding on his lap as much as I could, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I think you could eat something don't you?" I whispered, kissing his ear, and wondering if this would work.. because last time we tried.. it.. well, didn't. And I wasn't sure if I was up to that sort of embarrassment again.

I sighed heavily as he set me down. He could've made the choice to ignore it! To stay with me! To make... we were never going to do that. He was never going to let go of Abigail and I was fooling myself. I was.. I stopped thinking and smiled brightly when I heard pops and Kyle. "Hi, I'm great! Thanks!" I lied, watching Kyle, Pops and Jackson walk back in. "I'm craving loads of Italian food. But outside that nothing crazy.. although pickles does sound yummy, don't you think Kyle?" He giggled and shook his head no. "Well, more for me." I laughed, trying not to show my disappointment, especially with me realizing what I had.

I just sat there in silence, listening to Kyle, every once in awhile chiming in with a thought or two, and a smile, and ate. When I was done, I gave Kyle a kiss and told him to go ahead with his Pops and get ready for bed. I washed the dishes off in silence.

I closed my eyes as he wrapped his arms around me. "Don't be sorry. I'm glad Kyle came home." I turned and leaned up kissing his cheek before pulling away. "Actually I think I'm going to head back to my place. It's been a few days since I stepped foot in it and I wanna make sure it's still standing. And gotta get some chores there done. So I'll just catch a cab and see you tomorrow?" I asked, grabbing my coat out of the closet.

"I'm not leaving because of Kyle, Jackson. I'm leaving because we're fooling ourselves. Neither of us want this.. I tried.. and you tried... and it's just a waste of time. I mean, you were relieved to not have sex with me.. and don't act like you weren't. You forget I know you. You're my best friend, Jackson... I know you. And I saw Abby on your mind all night. And truth be told part of me can't forget Jeff either. So just let me go.. we need to stop pretending that we can be more than friends.. and parents. Okay? So just let go.." I pulled my hands away and tied my jacket shut.

My smile turned to a smirk. "You've never been smarter best friend!" I kissed his cheeks over and over before pulling back. "Now what's your first plan?" It hurt me somewhat that Jackson and I couldn't be together, for our baby's sake, but deep down we both knew we wanted to different things. Different people.

I hugged Jackson's neck before pulling back. "You genius.. we start tomorrow," I held my pinkie out. "And we don't tell a single soul. EVER. Ok?" I grinned. Sure this would be hard but I wanted Jeff and life without him was harder than being friends with my cousin again and lying a little to Jeff.