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PostSubject: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 12:39 am

Pregnant. I was pregnant! I had been wanting this for so long it felt surreal. Sure I hadn't been feeling well but I was sure it was my body getting my own hopes up.. but it was true. I was pregnant. The doctor himself confirmed it. I was having Jackson's baby. Our marriage was going to get better. I was sure of it. The second he heard it he was going to forget he didn't want a baby yet... and just be so overjoyed that I wouldn't have to feel bad for tricking this baby out of him.

I stared at myself in the floor length mirror in mine and Jackson's bedroom and ran a hand over my still flat stomach. "Our baby boy or girl." I whispered before I heard the door downstairs open. I hadn't seen Jackson before work. So not only would we have a wonderful homecoming but I'd be able to tell him he was about to be a father! I buried the paper in my dresser and ran downstairs, hitting the last step and jumping in his unexpected arms. "Oh, Jackson! I missed you so terribly! I'm so glad you're home!" I kissed him deeply before pulling back. "I have wonderful news.. I'm.. Jackson.." i stepped down out of his arms grabbing his hand, touching my stomach with it. "I'm pregnant..."
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:52 am

    I had been dragging my feet, not wanting to go home. I wasn't looking forward to what I was going to be doing. At one time, I thought I was going to be with Emily Grace for the rest of my life, but that all changed now that I was with Abigail. I was in love with Abigail, even if it had only been a few days and I hadn't told her yet, I was in love with her. I felt bad that I was going to be hurting Emily Grace like this, but I couldn't be with her anymore if I wasn't in love with her and I was with someone else.

    Coming in the door, I was attacked by her and an excitement I hadn't seen in the longest time. After she hugged me, she said something I hadn't been planning on. Blinking, I looked her over, my hand on her stomach. I froze there for a moment before I realized what was happeneing. "P..." Pulling my hand back, I shook my head. "Pregnant? But how is that...? We used protection." Walking past her, I headed back toward my office. I needed a drink. "We didn't want this yet, Emily Grace."

    Alright, so I wasn't ready for it. Yes, I wanted a family, but the time never seemed right. And now I knew why. Not now because of her telling me she was pregnant, but because I was with Abigail now. I dropped my bag on the couch and poured myself a drink. I needed a moment to think, to catch my breath. This didn't change anything, but maybe it was going to put a kink in it.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 9:06 pm

I sat there, staring in front of me, tears blurring my eyes as I stared at the closed front door. I knew he wasn't expecting this, and he hadn't really wanted a baby yet, but I was sure once he actually heard our baby was on his or her way he'd be happy. Even smile, but all he did was blow me off, and disappear into his office. I breathed in heavily, turned and stormed into his office. "How dare you! There was no we in not wanting a baby. There was a you! All I've wanted is a baby! And you refused to give it to me! But God had other plans obviously! But you know what..." I snapped, grabbing his drink, downing it before he could say a word, before tossing his glass at the wall watching it smash. "Since you don't care, I don't either, Jackson. I'll just abort it. Make your world perfect. A world where you can continue to act like a damn child! Where you can continue to act like your single and don't have a care in the world! Fuck a baby that is our DNA.. our love.. fuck it! Since you don't want it fine.. I'll never put my child through the punishment of a father who can't love him!" I turned, walked out of his office, slammed the door shut and walked to the front door to leave.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 9:48 pm

    I followed after her quickly, stopping her just before getting to the front door, turning her around and pinning her against the door. "Damn you, Emily Grace! You know I didn't want this yet, and we had decided we weren't going to yet. But you couldn't you do that?" I shook my head looking down at her, shaking my head. "If you're pregnant, there's nothing we can nor that I want you to do about it." I may not love her like I should anymore, but if we had created a child, I wasn't going to let her do anything to it. "That's my baby, whether we planned on it or not, it's still my child. You won't be doing ANYTHING to it. Do you understand me?"
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 10:46 pm

"Listen to you!" I said, shoving at him. "Blaming me! As if I did this on purpose! Obviously the protection was faulty! How is that my fault! I swear if I didn't love you so much I'd hate you! And you can't stop me from doing what I want with my own body! I refuse to let you make me raise this baby alone! I refuse! You dont want our baby! Admit it! I saw it in your face!" I started crying. "Let me go. This was suppose to be good and now it just hurts! Leave me alone!"
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:01 pm

    "I never said I would make you raise this baby alone." I was yelling at her, but I wasn't meaning to. I don't know what I meant by making it sound like it was her fault, but she knew I didn't want a child and she had been so happy about it, so natural assumption. "If we made a baby, then we made a baby. There's no going back from that." It didn't change that I didn't want to be with her anymore, but it was what it was.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:19 pm

I sniffled, nodding, touching his chest. "I love you.. and I'm sorry I got so upset.. it has to be the hormones. We're having a baby." I leaned up to kiss him. "I love you, Jackson. I know we didn't plan this but our baby is here.. and we're going to be wonderful parents. I know it."
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:35 pm

    Swallowing, I let her kiss me, but I didn't kiss back, not really. Smiling, I took a deep breath when I pulled back. "He or she will have everything they need, nothing changes that. Not how I feel. Nothing." It was cryptic, but it was honest.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:50 pm

I smiled, hugging him, and wondered why I felt so cold standing here with my own husband. Had this really broke our marriage? No.. it couldn't. We loved each other. Nothing could break that. I turned my head up, starting to kiss him more, wanting to feel his body. I hadn't in weeks. I needed his touch. "I need you.." i whispered. This would make it better. Sex always did.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Thu May 09, 2013 11:58 pm

    I leaned up, kissing her forehead. "I am here." I gave her a quick smile, turning from her and heading to the kitchen. "What we having for dinner?"
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:03 am

I just sat there staring, feeling the distance. "Why are you putting so much distance between us, Jackson?" I asked, on the verge of bursting into tears.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:05 am

    I looked back at her, freezing at the door. "I am hungry. I'm not putting any distance between us." Not that wasn't there before I came in the door anyway. I gave her a smile to reassure her. "Come on, lets eat. I'm famished."
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:16 am

"No," I said shaking my head. "You forget I know you. I've always known you.. you're my soulmate Jackson. Of course I know you. And your putting distance. You just turned down sex.. it was obvious that's what I wanted.. and you walked away. Something.." My lip trembled. "is wrong.. are you mad at me?"
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:25 am

    I rolled my eyes, looking in the freezer. Maybe we had a digiorno or something. "I'm hungry. Is that so bad?" How did it get so easy to lie? I hated it, but I couldn't just say things were over? I mean, she was carrying my kid. I had to find an easy way to do this.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:29 am

"Forget it.. Jackson. Keep that distance. Pretend everything is just a-okay and you aren't treating me like a stranger! I'm going to stay at my mother's.. you know where I am if you actually wanna act like my husband!" I snapped before turning and walking out of the house.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm pregnant!   Fri May 10, 2013 12:30 am

    Sighing, I shook my head, taking the pizza out and preheating the oven. I took my phone out to call text Abigail. I missed her.
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