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Bianca P
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PostSubject: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 5:16 am

I felt like I had been ran over by a bus. I felt weak. My eyes felt weak. I could barely even open them. I tried, hard, pushing them, willing them to open. It was dim in the room and I couldn't tell where I was. I tried to move, but I was too weak. Not only that, someone was in bed with me, holding me. I tried to speak, but nothing would come out. My mouth felt dry and all that came out was a brief cough. I licked my lips, but my tongue was dry and it didn't make my lips feel that good. Trying to speak again, I barely made a whimper escape my lips, followed by another cough. My body felt kinda sore, or maybe it was just weak. Why did I feel so weak. I felt like I'd been sleeping forever. I didn't know where I was or who I was laying by... Oh, help! Please don't tell me I got drunk and had sex with a total stranger. I finally realized I was in a hospital gown in a hospital bed in a hospital room... which only leads that I'm in a hospital. Buy why? Why was I in a hospital? What happened? I tried to move more, hoping the person beside me would wake up. I couldn't make out who they were. They were close, his head on the pillow against mine. I tried to slide away, hoping that would wake him, but I couldn't move very easily at all. "Wa... wake... up," I weakly told him, hoping he'd stir enough so that the rest of what I was doing to wake him would make him wake up completely.

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 7:19 pm

I was sure I was dreaming. I kept ignoring the noises I heard because I was sure it was my mind playing tricks. It had before and I had opened my eyes and been vastly disappointed, however, when I actually heard her voice my eyes snapped open. That had never happened before. I turned slightly, looking at her face, seeing her dark orbs looking back at me. I felt shocked... like someone had dipped my hand into a batch of water with a cord to a lamp in hand. "You're.. you're.. awake?" I let go of a heavy breath, shaking myself slightly and sitting up. "I knew this was going to happen.. I never gave up.. but.. Oh God, Bianca!" I whispered heavily, smiling brightly. I leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. "I knew you'd come back to me." I knew I should go get the doctors.. I knew that.. but yet I was frozen right here.. staring at my lovely Lily. Too shocked to move. "God, I love you." I whispered, smiling as I stared down at her.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:09 pm

Ok, I didn't know whether to be scared or even if I had a reason to be scared. Actually, I did. I wasn't scared. I was sure he wasn't going to hurt me. I felt that level of comfortability, but I had no idea who the man was, why he was kissing me, or why he had said he loved me. I coughed, looking away from him, trying to find something to drink. "Wa... wa...ter?" I was a bit disoriented and confused to say the least, but I needed something for my dry mouth. Something to drink, then we'd go from there. I wasn't panicked by any means, but I was disoriented to say the least.

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:17 pm

"Right.. sorry." I slid off the bed, walking over to the counter. I poured her a drink of water, bringing the glass over and putting the straw to her lips. "Here, slow sips." I whispered. When I could tell she had enough I set the glass on the counter and turned back to her. "I think I should get a doctor to see you.. make sure you're okay. Just relax and I'll be back, okay?"
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:21 pm

"No!" I told him quickly, blinking my eyes. I took a slow breath. "Please don't." I closed my eyes, breathing more slowly. "I don't want a doctor. Not yet." Opening my eyes, I looked back at the guy through the dim light in the room. I still didn't know who he was, but he seemed very concerned for me. How did I tell him I didn't have any idea who he was or who I was for that matter?

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:23 pm

"Lily, honey, a doctor should really look at you.." I sighed, sitting down on the edge of her bed. "Okay, I'll sit here for a second and then go get them.. how are you feeling?" I asked, smiling, still not believing she was back and at the same time knowing this was right..
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:28 pm

Alright, I was now even more confused. First he had called me Bianca... now he just called me Lily... Lily seemed more likely. Bianca didn't even sound familiar to me. But even Lily didn't seem like it was really my name, but it seemed familiar. "I'm alright. Feeling a little... misplaced... What am I doing here?"

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:39 pm

I took in a deep breath. "You.. were.. shot. You don't remember that night?" I really hoped I didn't have to explain it because I was pretty sure... no I knew that night was the worse night of my life.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:47 pm

I looked down at my hands, trying to figure out something. I couldn't really remember anything. There was nothing. I could remember basics, like math, 2+2=4, English, i before e except after c, science, cross-pollination, movies, music, just generalities, but I couldn't remember who I was, who this guy was sitting with me, or no other faces or names, unless it was historical people like Bill Clinton, Abraham Lincoln, Mozart... I didn't know anything about who I was, what I liked or anything along those lines. "I... don't know what night you're talking about. I don't know how I got here or why." I looked back up at him slowly. "But that's not all... I don't know what I don't remember."

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:52 pm

"You don't know what you don't remember?" I asked, wondering what that meant. "What does that mean?" I raised my eyebrow. "You mean you don't remember your accident.. or don't remember anything?"
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 10:00 pm

I shrugged slightly. "I remember a white guy means walk, a red hand means don't walk. I remember red is hot and blue is cold on a faucet. I remember the sky is blue and the grass is green. Most rivers flow toward the equator which is the middle of the earth. I remember there are 365 days in a year, seven days in a week, 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, 60 seconds in a minute. But ... other than... things like that... I don't remember... anything." I swallowed, this being the biggest reason why I felt so confused. "I don't even know who I am."

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 10:15 pm

My eyes opened wide, my heart dropping in my chest. "Oh.." I took in a sharp breath. "I really need to get a doctor.. if you can't.." i felt tears burn at my eyes and blinked them away. "remember that could be because of your head wound.. a side affect. I need to get a doctor. They need to examine you, okay? Can you understand that?" I asked, standing up. I also needed to breathe. The idea that Bianca didn't remember me.. and might never remember me was tearing a hole in my chest so big i could barely breathe.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 10:21 pm

I nodded, turning my head back to my hands. "I understand." Looking back up at him, I asked slowly. "But we can... talk after?"

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 11:01 pm

I nodded. "About anything. Everything. Whatever you want. Promise." I walked out, getting her doctor. I found her doctor, smiling softly as I came up to her at the nurse's station. "Bianca's up.. she's awake.. she doesn't remember anything as of right now.. but she's awake.."
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 11:48 pm

I looked up at Dante Castellano as he told me about Isabe-- Bianca waking up. It only took me a milisecond to process what he was telling me. I handed the chart I was looking at to the nurse next to me, pulling Bianca's file out of the chart rack, walking around the counter toward Bianca's room. I walked in, with Dante not more than on my heels. I flipped the light switch on and sat the chart down on the bottom of the bed. "Bianca, my name is Dr. Savannah Hodgins. You can call me Van." I stepped closer to her, looking over her eyes, making sure they had adjusted well to the light. "Do you know where you are, Bianca?" She looked up at Castellano before focusing on me. "A hospital? Beyond that, I don't know." I nodded my hed, taking out my otoscope from my pocket. "I'm going to take a look at your eyes, make sure they're responding correctly to light stimuli." She nodded slightly and I held the scope up to her eyes, watching the dilation. "How does your head feel?"
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 11:53 pm

The doctor lowered her flashing light thing and I looked over at the guy who had been in here when I woke up and had come back with the doctor, answering her. "He told me I had an accident..." I looked back at her. "That I was shot?" I couldn't remember it. I couldn't even remember who he was, how was I supposed to remember what happened on the night he said this had happened? I remembered some things, but there were some things I just didn't know.

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Fri Jan 13, 2012 11:59 pm

I nodded my head, putting my otoscope away in my pocket and lifting my hands to her head. "I'm going to take your bandage off and check your wound." She nodded slightly and I undid the bandage, looking at the sensitive skin of the wound. "It's looking really good." I smiled at her. "We'll let it get some air. I'll schedule an MRI and a CT Scan and be back in to check on you after we get the results. Then we'll havea better idea of what is going on in that delicate head of yours." She nodded slowly and I smiled at her. "I'm glad you're awake. I know your fiance is and everyone else will be as well." I smiled, turning back, smiling at Castellano as well. "I will check in with you soon."
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 12:04 am

Fiance? As in... man I'm going to marry? I shook it off and forcibly returned the doctor's smile. "Thank you, doctor." She left the room, leaving me alone with the guy. I smiled softly over at him, a real smile, not the fake one I'd just given the doctor. I don't think the doctor knew the smile was fake though. At least, she didn't seem to. But the smile I gave this guy was real. "She didn't stay long, did she?" I slightly laughed, taking a deep breath. "You said we could talk..."

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 11:29 am

"Yeah.." I nodded, sitting on the chair next to her bed. I didn't want to make her uncomfortable and if she didn't remember me, my being that close might bother her. "Any and all questions you have for me I can answer. No problem. Lay them on me." I said with a genuine smile.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:26 pm

I smiled at him. He seemed so sweet and caring. I felt bad that I didn't know who he was. "I think the biggest thing that is bothering me is ... I don't know who I am." I swallowed, inhaling slowly. "I mean, you called me Bianca and Lily and that doctor called me Bianca, but Bianca just doesn't seem to... it's not feeling right. Lily, even though I'm not sure if it is my name, feels more right to me. So, what's my name? Who am I?"

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:37 pm

"Well, your name on paper is Bianca Parisi, however, your a famous singer so you have a stage name - Isabella. Lily is my nickname for you. I've called you it since we were younger." I shrugged, smiling. "I'm sorry I confused you.. I flip back and forth between Lily and Bianca so often I don't even realize it. Oh, and your cousin, she calls you B. So I guess you have quite a few different names you go by.." I laughed slightly. Part of me was still aching but I was trying to keep it together for her. I didn't want to upset her. I was trying. It wasn't easy but I was holding the best I could.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:54 pm

None of them felt right except for the Lily. I didn't know who my cousin was, but I wasn't sure how B felt to me yet. "I like Lily," I told him, smiling softly at him. And I slowly inhaled, looking at him directly. "And I am sorry... but I... Don't know who you are." I did feel bad. I didn't want to hurt his feelings, but I was pretty sure it would.

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:59 pm

"I know you don't know me.. and that's okay. It's not your fault. Just know I care very deeply for you and I'm willing to do anything you want or need.. i will answer anything you ask with honesty and with the best knowledge I know. And I'm willing to go as fast or slow as you want.. I guess what I'm saying is.. I'm here for you." I shrugged. "So anything else you wanna know, Lily?" I asked, calling her the name she said she liked.
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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 5:11 pm

I thought he was very sweet and he was very caring. "You didn't tell me your name." I didn't like not knowing things, and I was sure it wasn't easy on him, but I didn't know how else to go about things.

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PostSubject: Re: ............................   Sat Jan 14, 2012 5:14 pm

"Oh, right," I laughed slightly. "Dante. Dante Castellano." I smiled softly. "Sorry, I have no idea why that didn't register with me.. I guess I'm just use to you knowing. Again, that's not your fault.. I just didn't think about it.." I wasn't going to force who I was on her. Not till I was sure she was okay with me. I didn't want to hurt her.. or make her feel uncomfortable.
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